I changed my mind

Ok...I know that I said I really am dreading the kids going back to school.

I lied.

Well it wasn't really a lie until this morning. So last night I decide it's time to start going to bed like it will be for school...or at least earlier than the night owl hours they have been keeping this summer. So by 9:30 all the sugarplums were nestled in bed.

Hubby fell asleep on the couch and I was alone.....

alooooooooooone..........like really alone.

Allison usually keeps me company but she was not here and I had finished up my writing for the day. OOooo today's articles were good ones: testicular cancer, pirate bedroom ideas, arthritis treatments, neopet siggy ideas and many other countless reasearch topics that took roughly 30 minutes.

Yes, I get paid for this people.

I digress.

So I'm sitting here and decide to watch Lost (yes I know I'm off topic but bare with me I'm on a roll). I watch a few episodes and then I get to one that BREAKS my heart. probably so far my favorite episode but nevertheless, I sit here worried about my favorite character. Yes....precious Sawyer. So in this eipsode, the "Others" (da da daaaaaaaa....creepy music) have decided to teach Sawyer a lesson and make it so he will behave. (This is Season 3 episode....can't remember, maybe 4 or 5) You know what they do to loveable Mr. Charismatic Sawyer??? They install a pacemaker in him that will cause his heart to explode if his pulse goes above 140. Kinda like a rev limiter for you heart. So if he gets worked up about anything ....

BOOM!!!

Only, not really. He sees Kate changing clothes and his pulse goes up and he dumps water over his head. He gets beat up and doesn't fight back (Kate tells him she loves him). Then he is drug up a mountain with the others and his pulse starts racing. Then the stupid dude Ben tells him that they really didn't install the pacemaker. :( They just wanted him to think they did so he would behave. They also showed him that he isn't still on "the" island but yet it's next door neighbor and there is no where to run. My poor Sawyer. I didn't watch another episode cause by now I had watched about 4 hours of lost and it was past 1AM.

OK....so back to the kids and school. This morning they got up during my peace and solitude time when I get most of my writing done because of course, they went to bed early so they get up early. I do think that as soon as their feet hit the floor they started fighting. UGGGH!!!! It's been this way ALL DAY LONG. One battle after another and quite frankly I'm stressed.

School starts in 11 days and while my little Maggie will be homeschooled she is SO easy to handle when she's alone. And I've already got a schedule planned.

I get up get everyone out the door and Maggie and I will do her school. She will be done around lunch so I will feed her and then write. I need to write about 5 hours a day to pay bills and have money left...about $1000 a week. I'll work a couple of hours, Julianna will come home, help her with homework.....ok so the details are boring. Bottom line, when they go to bed I'll spend a few more hours writing and do my classes and all should be good. Tuesdays I will not write, I will instead have a class that I must log on for from 5:30 to 8:30. I will probably take another day off but I'm not sure when. Probably on Sunday, maybe Monday.

I get sidetracked so easily. I started out telling you how horrible awful the kids were and I'm into schedules for Fall. It's 4:30 and I'm fixing barbque chicken for dinner. hubby will be home soon and I need to finish writing.

Payday tomorrow :-) Tax free weekend this weekend. Life is good!

Sadness

I miss my Alli........

Seriously.

Then today, I was waiting on her to call and she never called.

I go to call her cell and our phone isn't working.

I get my cell and the battery is dead.

So I plug up my battery and wait. Then the phone rings and it's someone for Julianna. What was up with that? Why was our phone not working. Tonight I notice that there had been a break in at a local pharmacy and the phone lines had been cut so we were without a phone during that time. :( :(

I never heard from Allison. So I'm assuming she tried to call when the phone was not working and I'm so sad. :(

I miss her!!

Tuesday

Even as an adult, the end of Summer is a sad time. Open house is next week for both Middle School and Elementary School, High School doesn't have open house. So basically the kiddos have this week left. Where did the Summer go? It's gone. It's supposed to rain all week so there won't be much time left for getting in the pool or riding bikes, playing at friends. :(

Maggie doesn't start until the 17th so she keep saying "Ha Ha...,you guys go back next week and I don't". Course she won't be singing when they get out a week earlier than she does.

And that's another thing. I'm getting scared of the whole home school idea. What if I can't do this? I mean, what if I don't get her caught up? :( Worries.

Allison is at band camp. I miss her. I miss her so much. I knew I would miss her but last night I was filled with this great sadness because she wasn't here. I couldn't get her off my mind. I won't see her for another 4 days :(

Oh and we saw Shawn Mullins last Saturday. YAY!!! I actually talked Brook into going. I LOVE LOVE LOVE Shawn! He's jsut as amazing as he was in College...no I take that back he's much MORE amazing.





So now we have tickets to see Shawn on August 19th. I'm so excited. Can't wait.

Will post more amazingness as I get it.

Tonight's dinner......Sausage biscuits and scrambled eggs :-)

So very happy

So very happy today. I could add a list of reasons why but I won't.

Let's just say that today is a very good day and leave it at that. :-)

Shawn Mullins

So yesterday was Shawn's concert in town. I wanted so bad to go. Had planned on it all week long. Was truly looking forward to it. Wanted to say hi to a long ago friend.

When I went to North Georgia College, what seems like many moons ago in the early 1990's, way before marriage and children and responsibility, I had a group of friends that were important to me. We hung out together, frequented a little sticky dive bar called Beauregard's and one of these friends was a musician. His name was Shawn. Very down to earth, good heart, sweet soul, kinda quiet and mysterious in that musician kinda way. He gave me his Cassette tape (not a CD but a Cassette) that he had produced himself. It was simply titled "Shawn Mullins".

It was then that I was introduced to his talented vocal stylings.

I remember blaring my stereo in the dorm with this music. Everyone knew him around campus. He was just an awesome guy and everyone liked that tape.

I remember walking across the campus, up the hill, usually drinking before we got there. Going into this little hole in the wall place. Tiny place, dirty, sticky floors, wobbly tables. There MAY have been 6 tables at most but I remember about 4.

It was always dark, always a couple of older locals, mostly us college kids. Shawn's friends.

He'd play on a stool in the corner. He was awesome.

The nights were always awesome.

My friend.

Gosh I haven't seen him in forever. Sadly, I had almost forgot about those times until about a week ago I saw he was going to be in town and something hit me. I missed those days. I missed his laugh. I missed his music. (He's so much better live than on CD).

We would go. I would say hi. See what he's up to. So excited.

Brook fell asleep. i tried to get him up yesterday. He had taken Graham to the skatepark, came home and I TOLD him not to go to sleep. He wouldn't get up.

Honestly. I don't think he wanted me to go. I TRULY think he felt threatened.

I started to go alone.

But didn't.

So now today, I'm so absorbed with opportunities lost. I should have went last night. I should have seen him. Life is too short and this is not happening again.

If it were HIM and something he wanted to do....there would have been no question.

From now on. I vow to live. No more opportunities lost.

I miss those days of Beau's. Not the drinking but the friendship. The fun. Why can't I have that now?

So anyway, today....I'm working, listening to Shawn on CD. Wishing for time to go back.

Won't happen, I know. But it will go forward and I'm not missing anything anymore. Even if I have to go it alone........

Thursday

Thursdays are good days. They are the days my pay drops. Amazing to me how I've changed my thinking. For example a few months ago, a $300 check at the time was great. This week I feel like I had a bad week and my check is $465. I didn't write much. i only wrote about 10 hours. I didn't do what I should have but review times were so bad because of 4th of July. This week I will buckle down and work my fanny off.

Went to Harry potter the other night with Alli. I was so tired but the movie was pretty good. There were some slow moments but now I don't have to read the book. I should watch the other movies to catch myself up. Now I can just skip the boring number 3 and read the last book. Of course, the book is always better than the movies for me cause I like using my own imagination to bring up images for the story line. I don't know. There are still so many books I want to read this Summer and Summer is almost gone :(

Was really disappointed with Maggie's Dr visit. I feel like he didn't really tell me anything. Don't know what to do now. :(

Cleaned out the pool yesterday and it's supposed to rain. Sigh.....and Maggie is sitting behind me saying over and over....Momma look...then two seconds later...."Look"...."look"....."look". She's doing dressup dolls on the computer and she wants me to see EACH AND EVERY CHANGE that she makes. Not so bad the first 3000 times but an hour later...I'm going insane.

Summer mornings

Yesterday I did something crazy. I know you will all think I'm nuts but I did it.

Yep! I went to Wal-mart. No that isn't the crazy part though it was pretty stupid considering it was a Sunday afternoon but no, that wasn't my crazy. Wanna know what I did? Well I'm gonna tell ya.

I bought school supplies. Can you even believe it's time? Wal-mart is having a huge sale and I thought it would be a good idea to go and get the sale stuff that was on my list. Crayons and glue for a quarter, rulers for ten cents, markers for a dollar. I left with over $30 worth of stuff and got maybe a third of Graham and Julianna's list.

Haven't started Allison's.

Even though Maggie will be home schooled I got a few things for her. She will need them and I do not want her to feel left out. I got her the thick markers, a pencil box, glue sticks etc. Oh my mom got this cute magnetic calendar dry erase board so that I can write her schedule for each month as I get it and we will know what is ahead of us.

The reading competition seems to have lapsed. Allison, of course, will win. I really need to MAKE Julianna read because she has a reading list, she did well at the beginning of the Summer and kinda fizzled. Today I'm gonna sit and let Maggie read to me. I want her to win that second place prize. She's close.

Speaking of little Loo. She had her well child exam and her Dr. referred us to a specialist for her possible LD. We have an appointment on Wednesday. He said he would ask us some questions and ask her some and get her to take a few little tests. Then we'll go back to her Dr. and together, the two of them, are supposed to figure out if she in fact has developmental delays or if it is a learning disability. I just want to get it straightened out for her. This is all new to me. Honestly I'm shocked that it's one my children. Now, I don't want that to sound bad. What I mean by that is you go through the "Why me?" stage. Well that is where I am. First I blamed everyone, past teachers particularly, then I blamed myself, a LOT. Now I'm over that. It is what it is and Maggie is just special.

We will get her through this. She can learn and she wants to learn, we just have to find out how she learns best.

Again it could simply be maturity issues. We will find out soon.

Allison begins band camp next week. Graham was going to baseball camp with Chipper this week but he gets immunizations on Tuesday, camp starts Wednesday...not such a good idea.

Gosh, is Summer over? Allison gets back from band camp on August 1st, she will have practice three days a week after that. School starts August 10th. Maggie starts August 17th. I start August 30th. Wow. Where did time go? :[

Time to work. Oh how I love to waste time but I have articles to write.

Supposed to storm some more today. I welcome the storms. C'mon rain.